The ones who do speak up in mainstream are irrelevant and noisy and the ones who could be relevant are quiet, unheard or ignored. It feels so good when you support and promote a project from the heart and later mainstream adopt and accept as its own. Same feeling is coming for the film 'Udaan'. I always have a gutsy feeling that big dreams of marginalized individual will bring monumental changes in India one day. There is a cynicism and lethargy attached in learning and doing of mainstream traditional institutions and people. Only few with passion are free from TBTC (Too Busy To Care) syndrome. The only difference between a professional and an enthusiast is that an enthusiast is willing to take risk and accepts deferred gratifications whereas a professional does not want to take the risk, and wants to be rewarded immediately. Leave apart these talks of others and come to the hotchpotch walk of my life;
As, the famous poet Al-Bayati moved between his homeland and the rest of the world. "I've always searched for the sun's springs," he said, "When a human being stays in one place, he's likely to die. People too stagnate like water and air. Therefore the death of nature, of words, of the spirit has prompted me to keep traveling, so as to encounter new suns, new springs, new horizons. A whole new world being born."
I don't travel much and has a monotonous work schedule in the life. While returning from office, I always watch the dusk. The sunset ignites the idea of mundane life, transient time and a deep urge for existence. I go deep inside and many questions are born in these vague moments of thoughtlessness. I transcend into an awkward reality with an invented illusion of abstract values. I always feel amazed that these moments shape up with/without purpose.
Life is somehow unfathomable by common mind. Each set of idea is countered by equally forceful reason and evidences. I observe the past from a deterministic point of view, where causes lead to effects. While world is more probabilistic in nature here outcomes are driven by invisible or chance events. So, how analysing the past can help me in documentation and drafting theories and making hypothetical narration about tomorrow. While the other part of brain argues that present is not entirely a random walk in the contingent—culture renders some steps more probable than others. Thinking of an individual is shaped by its surrounding. Inseparable from all narratives is a particular instantiation of politics, identity, and culture.The dilemma of split thinking continues...
In the time when everybody is in quest of high salaries, why I am tending towards some decent job with relaxation ? And in place of adventure and fun, why I am busy in learning about culture and development ? I make writing and reading as much a part of my life as I do eating or listening to music. Amid infinite space, no echo is heard and the questions of soul remain unanswered.
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