Life is calling, Where are you ?

I share a different me with each relationship. Sometimes friendly, intimate, affectionate, diplomatic, cold and even harsh behaviour can be observed. It appears as I have many parallel lives running inside me. Its very hard to behave and enjoy the life simultaneously. The consequence of this split personality is unhappiness and constant struggle inside consciousness.

Merging all personality into one. I am taking the risk of becoming one and may be alone in life. Reasoning can never transforms anybody but only love or hate ! As, we are dominated by the unconscious, not by the conscious. Loving everybody without duality of kin or stranger is producing harmony inside me.

Seriousness and possessiveness is a sickness created by ego. Let the life flow and live in present. Mind lives in future and past but only heart knows the beauty of each passing moment. Laugh, dance, sing and make joy...

Be aware of the moment. Don't try to concentrate on the narrow point. Be attentive without any frontiers. Mediation is not Yoga, its just being existence without any thoughts. Nothingness is the route of inner peace. Devoid of desires...

Life is beautiful because its insecure and fragile. Death awaits us next moment and all of our plans will sublime with us. No trace will be left anywhere. The way to love and live is to realize that all will end next moment....

"Falling in love you remain a child; rising in love you mature. By and by love becomes not a relationship, it becomes a state of your being. Not that you are in love - now you are love. " -Osho.

If you can’t dance, why join the revolution?

Bamboo flowers grow in span of 45-50 years and a famine struck the place with their flowering. Turbulent times produce turbulent lives. Centralization to decentralization happens in cyclic way, Indian or International level. So this circular needs keep the organization going, otherwise extreme of any path leads but to the decay. Mediocre to merit is next push. Rise of middle class is there through economic reforms. Next phase of reforms needed in pushing benefits to labour class. Those who are capable will be able to endure the hard times and visualize the better future.

Rural Management notion is still on in my heart. The problem of rural India is not unemployment but its unemployable individuals. Run NGO like business but with non profit motive. I don't hate technology, just not so efficient and pro active in this field. The intuition for change or new step is quite low. Columbus "discovered" America because apparently 25 million Native Americans don't count. I don't want me or anyone to discover this with rural India. I just want to experience myself on a pathless path in love of my country. And they say also, " Who travels for love finds a thousand miles not longer than one ". I am ready to wander this path for seeking myself.

"There is a pleasure in the pathless woods, There is rapture on the onely shore, There is society, where none intrudes, By the deep sea, and music in lits roar: I love not man the less, but Nature more." ~Lord Byron, Childe Harold’s Pilgrimage. 

I have wings not the roots. Hence, preparing for Rural management this year again. To each his/her own life. Enjoy the revolution with joy and fun !!!

Check : Why IRMA? & IRMA Alumni Association
Also check the video was shot during the GD-PI process of PRM 30. It was presented during Abhivyakti by PRM 29. Quite asking the statement of purpose of preparation:

Tum ko dekha to ek khayal aaya

Lust is easy. Love is hard. Like is most important. ~Carl Reiner

I see myself in the mirror each day and fall for my reflection there. Rarely, I feel that there is an ego reflecting in the image. It shows my vanity clearly. The importance of being there for impressing others overtake the real me in public life.

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is around you. This had been, has been and will be only truth about love. To accept the world as it is. Desire to capture, possess or change others is self defeating in love. Life, love and understanding are qualities to be admired and incorporated in yourself for enjoying the life.

Any relationship lasts that is rooted in friendship. Atleast we can speak our hearts out to them. Some persons are complete strangers or acquaintance for us. You can't express about yours feeling to them for the fear of losing that illusion of closeness.

One day, I look at the person and I feel something more than I did the second before. The decay in relationship starts there. Now, the person who was just a face a moment ago is now turned suddenly the only person I can ever imagine myself with. And there is an one side affection that makes me feel like the whole world is complete. This act happens unconsciously. I take it as dilemma whether mind surrenders or it creates an illusion. Every time I look that unknown, it makes me to want it even more. Is it a desire for achieving something or an invisible bond between us.

All plans and pre preparation goes waste at the time of expression. Fear of being ignored, ridiculed or even broken comes in front of the eyes. And how I will react on dejection clouds the mind. Its impossible to tell yourself to stop wanting someone when the something inside rebel against it!

All rational thoughts end at that point of time. Even dreams are manipulated through mind or object of desire. Can you love same person all your life at each moment ? I will say no. Still, How is it possible that I feel nostalgia for a person I never knew so closely ? Why I desire for a person that can't come with me in the life ? Why do we let someone become priority in our life when we aren't even an option for considering to them ?

This is a purely fictional post and not related to me by any means... Don't sit on my head for originality or piracy !

Anbe Sivam

Love is god, that's meaning of Tamil title written here. I exist within me only. Others exist because one imagine others do. Otherwise, other is not here. No past and future, only present exist. And, there is nothing to give and take in the world. Only to share with the others. All relations, friends, acquaintance and strangers are just a small part of your life. Don't take any talks of culture, religion and civilization sincerely. They are decaying with each moment of time. Death is most lovable part of life. It can come in conscious or unconscious state of mind. Love is only truth everywhere. Just be spontaneous and devoid of mind in relationships to God or others. Mind is manipulative and will peel love like onions infinitely. There is enough room for everyone in the heart if you love. Spirituality is not a separate way or field, its just life when our stomachs are filled. We are alone deep down and can feel it naturally. So be natural, free of ambition, past, future, comparison, beliefs. Just exist :)[I smiled first time on the blog today ] Ciao !

Baavra mann dekhne chala ek sapnaa

What mind divides through analysis, the heart unites through compassion. Now, there is a peace inside heart as the mind is working on my will. No more nostalgia, desires or ambition. The present will take all sorrows of past and worries of future. The calmness will lead towards silence. The awareness will increase and concentration efforts will reduce. Such is the statehood of awareness. The words coming out will not be manipulative by mind and all lines written before will loose its radiance. The struggle of writer inside you will vanish and only love will be in the air. You have to just stop observation and learn the art of watching, watching without any judgment. The ego raised by sexuality, greed and anger will dissolve. You will rise against repression and feel the joy of expression. You will laugh like mad even when no one else is around. And you will really mean it...