Kanpur Coaching Gurus

Memories of coaching days at Kanpur are inseparable from me. I have done a separate post on Kanpur coaching mandi only. The most remembered image of my coaching days was the advertisement of Ankush Bhatia by Pran classes, and it was pasted on each wall of Kanpur. His photo was spread at distant corners of the city, showing All India Rank 51. Never seen any local marketing campaign like this. Sometimes, I recall the rush of students from one coaching center to another for seat capture, xerox copying of assignments, and 'out-of-course' study material. The JEE course was never completed on time in the Kanpur coaching mandi. At the end of March, the mad rush to complete the course began with various test series taking place simultaneously. I could not forget that pressure till now. I will never forgive Anish, Pankaj, and Vishnoi sir for combining their individual treats into 1 party for JEE-qualified students. For information on the pre-2000 AD days of coaching mandi, check this link. Writing a few lines about them in the blog is mandatory for me. It is a rough recollection of data, just written casually. 

Physics: 

1. Ajay Narkar, sir, is a crazy personality and a self-made figure. He holds the record of slapping up to 1200 students and teaching 16 hours a day. He lectures students like God and gives curses to them like the devil. He is obsessed with self-praise and mechanics. He has made 'Concept of Physics by HC Verma' famous in the coaching mandi. According to him, you can't play Holi or go to a movie because playing Holi or shopping, or watching the cinema for 2 hours, will stop you from getting into IIT. On the other hand, listening to his autobiography (although inspiring) for 5 hrs is a heck of a time utility. His famous words: " hum hum hain,baki pani kam hain; baangduon assignment pura hona chaiye; bhailogo kya bolte ho." 

2. Anish Srivastava sir is famous for his orange shirt and black trousers combination. We have never seen him in any other dress. It was lovely to see Anish sir making a diagram precisely with various colored chalks. The timespan of his class was only 2 hours, the least by any physics teacher in that area. Paanch (Coca-Cola ad by Aamir Khan) was used to shout by the coaching junta for every arbitrary occasion in the classroom. His famous words on entering the class---write down the heading and take out the booklet !! 

Maths:

1. Ashish Vishnoi Sir took entry in class and exclaimed daily, "pani lana, ac on kar do, marker dena.................". Acute Dialogues for students---" kripya grameen bhai idhar dhyan de; abe chor ho yar tum log,apne gaon ki bus pakad lo aur katlo yaha se; kisi ko zada hero banne ki zaroorat nahi hai, beta latak jaaoge; jyada topchee na bano poori class milke bhi mera kuch nahi ukhar paoge; are yaar abhi saal bhar baad yanhi rikshaw chalate najar aaoge; are yaar ab regular valon ki tarah har question mat pucho" ...last but most famous "aap log totaal suar hain". 

2. Anurag Vishnoi sir is the brother of Ashish sir. He usually teaches for an extra class and test sheet discussion. His famous phrases: "Aray bhai aap log to itne intelligent ho ki meri aankhen bhar aayi; jo log baat kar rahe hain unke liye mujhe showroom mein ek chamchamata hua rikshaw dikh raha hai; yaar kabhi bhi aapke khandan me kabhi bhi koi jee me select nahi hoga. 

Chemistry: 

1. Nirmal Singh Sir, my favorite of all. The short and shiny T-shirts of Nirmal sir made him the most fashionable figure. Pink, Cream, and Green colors shine in the whole class. He seldom got angry, but his comments were to the point. He teases girls with his mild-mannered comments that make us laugh hard on the floor. How can one forget Nirmal sir ke wo fundoo association of ideas like Adla Badli (Ajnabee) or electron migration priority decision by using the example of Biwi no. 1. Chaudi kamar was used for ligands, especially the mugging trick for carbohydrate chapter "rekha aur amitab mile to lage thumka". 

2. Pankaj Agrawal, sir, has a reputation for having absolute knowledge of physical chemistry. But his repo was built on his misery rather than his lifestyle. He is more miser than 10 Uncle Scrooge standing together over a pile of money. We have known about his tussle with the income tax department every year. His typical posture was to take the assignment sheet in one hand and itch his head with the other hand. Particular was the only word that was repeated at least 20 times per class. And asking everyone with a smile that shows frontline teeth, 'Agar kar sakte ho to jee ke baare mein sochna warna bhool jao'. Somebody at Orkut created a great abbreviation for him: P--Puchhunga, A--aata hai?, N--nahin aata!!, K--karo, A--aayega, J--JEE mein. Absolutely PANKAJ. Pankaj sir usually quotes: "Photo nahi lagegi it paper me. padna padega" & "ab main kuchh jano ko particular class se bahar karne wala hoon ab aap sambhal jayein." 

3. Sanjay Chauhan, famous for his cheap dialogues and command in organic chemistry. "ladkiyoon, pad lo... nahi padogi.. to chaati per baith kar padaunga... aur phir bhi nahi pada.. to chaati per kudoonga... taki dard ho.. shayad tab padogi...

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I have not mentioned here O.P. Juneja, Sanjeev Rathore, Mahesh Singh Chauhan, Raj Kushwaha, Vivek, and G.D. Verre. Also worth mentioning here is Cobra Sir for his popular pseudonym. But to end this article, a quote from Kanpur coaching mandicomese as "latest but most rocking "--36 hazar ka chadawa chada diya 3 bagvano k o, ab to selection pakka samaj gaye hain...............